10.27.2008

i dont even know.....

confusion, caused by you, we were always there, I was always there. I think this word is vague and doesn't describe anything but lies. Is it confusing when your phone rings and you don't answer? Or when you come home, where your 'friends' are and you don't call them? I don't seem to think so but I guess I mean, if you are new to the english language that word may be confusing.

Days, weeks, months, a friendship like ours, or what I thought we had, should and has lasted those distances, miles and minutes, before why the sudden change? hmmmmm.

Growing and changing is all in you, you have control of these, not physically but mentally you do. If you like someone and you want them in your life you make time for them, or you try, trying isn't a hard skill to learn.

caring, strange word, maybe even confusing, when I care about someone I like to talk to them. Or rather I need to talk to them when substantial things happen in my life. I care about people and make sure they are ok. When I care about people I assume that they care about me and that I can trust them and confide in them with what's going on in my life instead of just drifting away. Drifting isn't apart of caring.

If you aren't having fun, then maybe that is something that you need to asses in yourself, who do you want to hang out with? Would you rather hang out with people your own age or leave a party that your friends, your girls, are at to hang out with people much younger and much less mature than you because there are more people there and you might....'I'm going to be nice'.

Retreat is a sign of weakness. To grow stronger you must face your fears and your problems. And who better to do this with than your friends...or 'friends' as we see it.

Personal or not, shouldn't friends be able to discuss problems and life without pushing each other away? Rough times bring me closer to my friends, well friend now I guess.
I grew more this summer than I ever imagined. I grew as a person, not farther or closer to anything but within myself because of the things that I went through and I was forced to deal with and forced to lose. This wouldn't have happened if I didn't have someone to talk to about everything that was going on, someone to cry in front of, someone to listen all of those times, a friend.

MJSBJ rip.

There are so many paths in life, it all depends on which one you choose, or if you choose to stay on one path the whole time or cross over half way through. Life is in the hands of the living. Don't take it for granted, you have it now, but it could be stolen from you when you least expect it.

Space from some friends and not from others isn't being alone. Being alone isn't the issue here, it is again a choice, one that was obviously made and is seen by all effected. No excuse.

Im glad the re-evaluation of lifestyles and life in general has arisen, this should be done often and before it is to late......

Distance is inevitable, friendships last a lifetime when cared for, and given water and sunlight. But when neglected and forgotten they are just that.........

alive, strong, getting by.

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